Self Help & Misc. Instresting Stuff.
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Posting this beautiful set of puzzle. It has a simple and a creative solution. And while resolving this one, it will set a masterkey to unlock the answers to hundreds more.... as it requires us to change our perspective as to how we see things....
To those who have the answer (most likely that you have come across this before) please do not reveal the key to find the solution - as it will deny other folks a chance to work out the answer themselves.... Thanks.
To those who have worked it out, you may post your answers, with revealing how you derived the same.....
Posting this beautiful set of puzzle. It has a simple and a creative solution. And while resolving this one, it will set a masterkey to unlock the answers to hundreds more.... as it requires us to change our perspective as to how we see things....
To those who have the answer (most likely that you have come across this before) please do not reveal the key to find the solution - as it will deny other folks a chance to work out the answer themselves.... Thanks.
To those who have worked it out, you may post your answers, with revealing how you derived the same.....
O.k... So Vertigo knew the answer, and Rish revealed the key....
I find the puzzle to be beautiful, because it will not be solved by logic no matter how hard one tries.... It is only when we change our perspective (turn the puzzle upside down) does the answer reveal itself in an instant.... And till we persist in finding the solution without changing our perspective, we will be like the person who tries repeatedly to open a lock with a wrong key.....
The answer to the puzzle has a good life lesson as well. At times, we will be grappling with a problem and not be able to find any solution... how about if we like in the puzzle, change our perspective at how we look at things???
I find the puzzle to be beautiful, because it will not be solved by logic no matter how hard one tries.... It is only when we change our perspective (turn the puzzle upside down) does the answer reveal itself in an instant.... And till we persist in finding the solution without changing our perspective, we will be like the person who tries repeatedly to open a lock with a wrong key.....
The answer to the puzzle has a good life lesson as well. At times, we will be grappling with a problem and not be able to find any solution... how about if we like in the puzzle, change our perspective at how we look at things???
How I Finally Learned To Stop Being 'Too Nice' - Michelle Martin (Edited excerpt)
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/miche...ce_b_8545022.html?ir=India&adsSiteOverride=in
(Beautiful article in a world were confirming is seen as a virtue, but we need to be true to ourselves and find our own voice...)
I have been told how nice I am my entire life. This is usually a great compliment to me. I love it when people tell me I'm nice, because I am nice. In fact, throughout my life I've tried my best to be kind, caring, empathetic and helpful to just about everyone I meet. These qualities are the bedrock on which much of my identity is based. I have learned over the years though that "nice" is good, but "too nice" is not. "Too nice" is the person who doesn't like to ruffle feathers. "Too nice" is the person who is afraid to set boundaries. "Too nice" is the person who is afraid to say no. "Too nice" is the person who I used to be (and still am, sometimes).
When I reflect back on my life and my various relationships -- with men, with friends, with family, and even with some co-workers, I can now see how being "too nice" was my way of staying safe, of avoiding conflict, and of remaining emotionally intact. When I hit 50, I escalated a journey I'd been on for a few years, where I challenged myself to be more honest in all areas of my life -- honest about my wants, and my hopes and also about my fears. When I hit 50, I began the process of examining my desire, my need, and in some contexts, my compulsion to be "too nice." When I hit 50, I began to realize that being "too nice" gave me a high, it was my addiction, my chosen drug of avoidance.
So I set about to figure out my seeming need to constantly appease. I assumed that at the core of my issue was a need to be accepted and secure; needs that sat right alongside a fear of being seen and summarily rejected, so I worked hard on becoming more courageous and bold. And yet, while I may have been overly accommodating on the outside, I never lost touch with who I really was on the inside. I maintained my sense of identity, my own reality, my own self. I retained me. So while some people may have seen me as passive, I knew the truth -- it wasn't that I was passive; I was just so busy protecting myself emotionally, that I wasn't always present enough to share who I really was.
And that's when it hit me. I wasn't being "too nice" so I could be accepted, I was being "too nice" to ensure the survival of my identity. And I wasn't being "too nice" to avoid being rejected, I was being "too nice" to avoid being seen. It takes a lot of effort to say yes, when we really mean no, to say we're okay, when we're really not, to always focus on the other person's needs, when we have a boatload of needs of our own. So after a season of being "too nice," there was always that inevitable point where I exhausted myself, where I couldn't go on another minute without rest. It takes a lot of effort to say yes, when we really mean no, to say we're okay, when we're really not, to always focus on the other person's needs, when we have a boatload of needs of our own. So after a season of being "too nice," there was always that inevitable point where I exhausted myself, where I couldn't go on another minute without rest.
But then I turned 50 and decided it was time to learn how to be who I really am without the option of escape. It's still difficult for me at times to remain completely present with others while expressing how I feel and what I believe, without the security of knowing I can hide, but I'm doing it, and every day it gets little easier. The key is to tell myself what I used to tell my son when he was young: "Use your words." If I am feeling overwhelmed, if I am feeling engulfed, I don't have to hide. I can say how I'm feeling and ask for what I need. I can use my words. I have no control over what happens next -- hurt feelings, disappointment, anger, or understanding, acceptance and love -- and that's perfectly alright because I only need to have control over myself. My greatest challenge is remembering every day to rest in the knowledge that as an adult, it is no longer possible for me to be engulfed, as I was when I was a child. I am a powerful presence even when I'm not trying to be, and I no longer need to retreat to be who I really am. In fact, none of us do.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/miche...ce_b_8545022.html?ir=India&adsSiteOverride=in
(Beautiful article in a world were confirming is seen as a virtue, but we need to be true to ourselves and find our own voice...)
I have been told how nice I am my entire life. This is usually a great compliment to me. I love it when people tell me I'm nice, because I am nice. In fact, throughout my life I've tried my best to be kind, caring, empathetic and helpful to just about everyone I meet. These qualities are the bedrock on which much of my identity is based. I have learned over the years though that "nice" is good, but "too nice" is not. "Too nice" is the person who doesn't like to ruffle feathers. "Too nice" is the person who is afraid to set boundaries. "Too nice" is the person who is afraid to say no. "Too nice" is the person who I used to be (and still am, sometimes).
When I reflect back on my life and my various relationships -- with men, with friends, with family, and even with some co-workers, I can now see how being "too nice" was my way of staying safe, of avoiding conflict, and of remaining emotionally intact. When I hit 50, I escalated a journey I'd been on for a few years, where I challenged myself to be more honest in all areas of my life -- honest about my wants, and my hopes and also about my fears. When I hit 50, I began the process of examining my desire, my need, and in some contexts, my compulsion to be "too nice." When I hit 50, I began to realize that being "too nice" gave me a high, it was my addiction, my chosen drug of avoidance.
So I set about to figure out my seeming need to constantly appease. I assumed that at the core of my issue was a need to be accepted and secure; needs that sat right alongside a fear of being seen and summarily rejected, so I worked hard on becoming more courageous and bold. And yet, while I may have been overly accommodating on the outside, I never lost touch with who I really was on the inside. I maintained my sense of identity, my own reality, my own self. I retained me. So while some people may have seen me as passive, I knew the truth -- it wasn't that I was passive; I was just so busy protecting myself emotionally, that I wasn't always present enough to share who I really was.
And that's when it hit me. I wasn't being "too nice" so I could be accepted, I was being "too nice" to ensure the survival of my identity. And I wasn't being "too nice" to avoid being rejected, I was being "too nice" to avoid being seen. It takes a lot of effort to say yes, when we really mean no, to say we're okay, when we're really not, to always focus on the other person's needs, when we have a boatload of needs of our own. So after a season of being "too nice," there was always that inevitable point where I exhausted myself, where I couldn't go on another minute without rest. It takes a lot of effort to say yes, when we really mean no, to say we're okay, when we're really not, to always focus on the other person's needs, when we have a boatload of needs of our own. So after a season of being "too nice," there was always that inevitable point where I exhausted myself, where I couldn't go on another minute without rest.
But then I turned 50 and decided it was time to learn how to be who I really am without the option of escape. It's still difficult for me at times to remain completely present with others while expressing how I feel and what I believe, without the security of knowing I can hide, but I'm doing it, and every day it gets little easier. The key is to tell myself what I used to tell my son when he was young: "Use your words." If I am feeling overwhelmed, if I am feeling engulfed, I don't have to hide. I can say how I'm feeling and ask for what I need. I can use my words. I have no control over what happens next -- hurt feelings, disappointment, anger, or understanding, acceptance and love -- and that's perfectly alright because I only need to have control over myself. My greatest challenge is remembering every day to rest in the knowledge that as an adult, it is no longer possible for me to be engulfed, as I was when I was a child. I am a powerful presence even when I'm not trying to be, and I no longer need to retreat to be who I really am. In fact, none of us do.
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